Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Vipers Vs. Dinocroc

I had no idea that my little ‘Merica rant last week was going to inspire such fervor in certain folks, I guess I’m sorta flattered that it strikes such a chord, both positive and negative with people. SO to the haters who think that my list is simply a list of things that I don’t like, I’d like to use my seldom read public forum as a place to tell you that your WRONG! I put things on that list I like, in addition let me reiterate we all have a little ‘Merica in us, and it’s ok to visit that, YOU JUST SHOULDN’T LIVE THERE! It’s not a condemnation on you as a human being; it’s just an observation. If you don’t like my ‘Merica list, then make your own.

When Giant Reptiles Attack” Movie-A-Thon was Saturday, and insanely enough it came down to Dave, Liz, & us. Everyone else either didn’t show or cancelled VERY last minute. It’s not that I have high expectations of attendance, considering we have gatherings like once a month, but it is slightly irritating to have so many peeps make claims of attendance and then back out. Oh well, you know what it was FREAKIN’ AWESOME anyways. As for what we watched;
- Vipers (** out of 5 Stars) – Oh Terra Reid how far can a career fall, well most likely as far as your bad boob job sags? This is one of those movies that is so gleefully bad that it’s hilarious. Genetically engineered vipers, that can cure cancer by the by, invade an island town & mayhem ensues. There is some nudity, some really REALLY entertaining scene “chewing”, and of course some SyFy Channel quality CGI. So if your looking for something that will give you a good laugh, then get some friends together, and take a gander at this “gem”.
- Snakes On A Plane (**** out of 5 Eddy Kim’s) – I readily admit I had not seen this flick, in fact I’d somewhat avoided it as I feared watching it and being disastrously disappointed. I felt like this is a flick you HAD to watch with friends & had to be in the right mind set to enjoy. I was completely CORRECT! I would whole-heartedly recommend this movie if for nothing else the magnificent villain Eddy Kim. He is surely underrated in the movie villain pantheon. His name should be talked about in the same unholy reverence as Darth Vader, Earnest Blofeld, Voldomort, and the Joker. Who else, WHO I ASK YOU, would think to not only fill a plane with poisonous snakes, but to also fill it with pheromones that would make them like “snakes on crack”? WHO? Eddy Kim that’s who. In fact I found the movie to be severely lacking when Kim wasn’t on screen. Overall watching this movie with the people there was a treat.
- Dagon (***** out of 5 Stars) – How to explain Dagon? Well next to the black and white, silent film production of Call Of Cthulhu (Infinite *'s out of 5 Stars) it is the BEST of the Lovecraft adaptations. It’s sort of a modern re-working of the “Shadow Over Innsmouth”. It’s gory, the special effects are decent, the acting is good, but the thing that makes it SO good is the vibe and feel of the film, it is PUERLY Lovecraft. So if you like a good ole’ fashion nasty horror movie, then this one is for you.

My weekend viewing was limited to simply Movie-A-Thon festivities though;
- Skinwalkers (** out of 5 Stars) – Thank gawd for Fear.net. I get to watch a lot of schlock horror that I otherwise wouldn’t have wasted my time on. See I can’t help but wake up at my ‘normal’ time even on weekends, so while my better half sleeps away I have to find ways to entertain myself. This was one such attempt. What to say about this flick? Well the special effects, done by Stan Winston’s company, are quiet good. It’s your basic werewolves vs. werewolves’ movie, with a whole prophecy thing thrown in. There is an interesting twist involved as well as the fact that it stars the hot chick from Doomsday (*** out of 5 Stars). Otherwise it’s a pretty pointless time wasting experience.
- Smallville: Absolute Justice (*** ½ out of 5 Stars) – So I’m not rote on Smallville normally as I don’t watch the show, but I had heard, and seen pictures, that comic scribe genius Geoff Johns was writing a two-part episode with the amazing Justice Society Of America. Suffice to say I HAD to watch it. Well the good of it was the story, and all the JSA rube cred that was in the episode. The bad was the acting, I did NOT enjoy the guy who played Hawkman trying to out-Bale Christian Bale’s angry Batman voice, and the costumes were sort of hit and miss. The ugly is it’s been what, ten years of this show and still Clark isn’t in the Superman outfit? GAH! C’mon people! Overall it was enjoyable, had a nice Watchman/Golden Age story feel to it, and more than anything else it was a chance to see the JSA written by the guy who got famous writing them show off how cool they can be in a new medium.
- Prince Of Darkness (********** out of 5 Stars) – I LOVES me some John Carpenter. I’ve seen this movie like a hundred times, but I got the chance to expose Cassandra to it. I always know a horror movie is good if she enjoys it, and she seemed to like this one. This, I believe, is part of Carpenter’s Lovecraft Cycle of three films; The Thing, In The Mouth Of Madness, & Prince Of Darkness. It’s the most ‘meta-physical’ of the three, it’s most certainly not as overt as The Thing, and not as mind bending as In The Mouth Of Madness, but it has it’s own charm. Most of all it sticks to it’s Lovecraft roots by putting academics in a position where they push that envelope of knowledge into areas that “man was not meant to know” and insanity ensues. I highly recommend this flick.

Man, I’m losing steam today so how about some


- I get to scarf chicken wings at Al Bakers this Thurs., and I for one CAN NOT WAIT!
- Today I had to give training on professionalism, FOR TWO HOURS! So I got to rant and rave, but I’ll be damned if by the end I was/am fried. I just don’t understand how anyone can’t treat his or her job like a precious asset, especially in this economy. We all are replaceable; I just aim to make myself as indispensable as possible. I guess every single person has to have his or her own personal & professional mantra.
- Electric Six is single handedly saving our 1 ½ hour bad weather commute. BELIEVE IT!
- I know I have to go home and finish shoveling the driveway and I’m both fearing and loathing it. Yesterday shoveling twice sucked, now I’ll have to shovel twice again today. Part of me enjoys the work out, and the other part of me HATES that part of me as I sit on the couch feeling like ten tons of crap stuffed into a five-pound bag.
- Brett Farve WILL be back. Like the Terminator.
- Dan Didio should be beaten to within an inch of his half-wit life if he even publicly breathes a word again of a possible Watchman prequel, sequel, or related project.
- I need to start painting. I have almost everything primed now I just need to get on the actual painting. I have read a few blogs on how to get through armies quick and efficiently, and lord knows I have a few armies worth of figs to paint. Maybe this Friday I’ll sit down and devote some time.
- I think we’re making quesadilla’s out of left over BBQ ribs and chicken tonight. If not, WE SHOULD!

I guess I really didn’t have that much to talk about.

“Military intelligence two words combined that can’t make sense…”

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